Upon broaching the topic of ‘what commitment means in marriage?’ with engaged couples, marriage preparation course facilitators often receive a variety of responses.

The most common response is that commitment means ‘I like how this relationship works and I’m committed to it.’

However, a deeper commitment to maintain a loving marriage is necessary if two people want their marriage to endure. Working through problems, listening to each other’s needs, and understanding that both futures lie together, helps deepen trust, security and safety in your relationship.

Taking the Leap

To make commitment a genuine centre-point of your relationship you must first talk about it. What do both partners think it means? How will commitment shape day-to-day living? Are you ready to compromise and negotiate on certain issues to make the marriage work? If so, can you both wholeheartedly agree to do that?

When difficult and sensitive issues have been discussed and understood, it can make standing at the altar together a truly special moment. Making a public declaration of devotion before God and witnessed by your loved ones means so much more when the commitment of Sacramental marriage has been explored, and understood.

Ways to Deepen Commitment

Here are some ideas that might make commitment an everyday presence in your relationship:

• Talk about hopes and dreams: Looking ahead to the future can reinforce commitment to one another.
• Spend quality time together: Making time for each other shows continued dedication and love.
• Chat about how you met and the reasons you fell in love: Reflecting on this and the feelings expressed keeps a relationship healthy and refreshed.
• Share spiritual and religious activities: This is a very helpful way to promote a shared growth with one another.
• Stay intimate and physically close: From greeting each other with a kiss every day to the greatest expression of commitment, keeping intimacy alive also means staying as close as possible.

Commitment is a foundation on which a marriage is built, and is therefore a way to stay connected and loving within it. But it’s also a choice, and when taken should remain foremost in thoughts and actions moving into a shared future together.