28th July 2014
Have you stopped connecting with your partner as you once did? It’s not uncommon to see relationships evolve over time to a point where both partners don’t talk about feelings, hopes and concerns at the same level they used to.
Communication will always be a fundamental aspect of a loving relationship because it is a process whereby you gain insights and perspectives into your partner’s world.
It’s very easy to get into a habit of taking each other for granted and not paying sufficient attention to each other’s feelings and needs. Perhaps you don’t greet each other lovingly as you once did, or talk as enthusiastically about the future and your shared plans. Recognising this may be the easy part, but doing something to remedy it takes a little more work.
Learning to communicate meaningfully takes time and effort, and spending the time on improving communication is imperative.
Agree to set some daily time aside to chat about what happened during the day. Simply acknowledging your partner’s daily life can work wonders. Going for a long walk or drive will give you uninterrupted time together. Getting out of the house can reduce distractions and interruptions and provide an opportunity to talk and listen to one another
If possible on a weekly basis, try and take a few hours or even a day to spend time together. Have a meal at that new restaurant you’ve wanted to try, or call to friends, colleagues, relatives that you haven’t seen in a while, together. Annually, if possible an extended holiday can afford opportunities to get away together and enjoy some activities you’re both interested in.
If your goal is to reconnect on a deeper level being empathic towards one another can help this process. Empathy involves paying attention, listening and trying to understand your partner’s experience of life. Validating your partner feelings can give him/her a sense that you understand them or are at least trying to.
Pay attention to your partner by greeting them with a smile or an affectionate touch. Demonstrate interest in how your husband or wife is feeling. When the other is expressing worries or talking about a tough day, listen and perhaps say “I would like to understand how you’re feeling.
Small acts of kindness and empathic responses can help to re establish a deeper connection and more meaningful communication, and can lead to a greater level intimacy in your relationship.